Things I feel are imparing my ability to finish things in a timely way:
-Sleep schedule: I do my best work at night. Unfortunately, I am currently employed (look at the way it sounds like I’m complaining about being employed in IL… a state with one of the highest unemployment rates in the country, good Lord) and in being so at a job that requires you to work days, I have no ability to stay up as late as my brain would desire to facilitate the mind-state I need to get shit done.
-Drugs: Not the illegal kind, but the kind that have commercials featuring things like green butterflies and the like. Because my brain likes to work best at around 3AM, I need to take sleeping medication to keep me, you know, asleep. Unfortunately, the side effects of these drugs (I’ve tried all kinds!) that actually keep me asleep and help me fall asleep (I have had issues with both since I was about 10) are insane. I’m not even kidding. Not only do I act like a fool if I am up longer than a half hour after I take them (and trust me, I do), but I am just horribly un-functional in the brain during the hours I am awake and supposed to be (Literally, these groggy-mornings crap take until about 12:40PM to actually wear off which is ridiculous), no matter WHAT amount of sleep I get. I decided to test a recent theory that I don’t actually need the drugs anymore to fall asleep this weekend, and found it to be completely UNTRUE. I didn’t fall asleep until around 4AM Saturday night. Good Lord.
-Time: I hate blaming time, because I’m often one who’s like “If it was something you really wanted to do, you’d make the time”… Unfortunately, I really don’t find the time, even when I want to do it. Seriously, there are days you could come to me and say “Eat this tray of brownies” and I’d (begrudgingly) say “I can’t. I have to go to work!” (Best toddler tantrum voice you could possibly read that in is completely appropriate) Really, it’s getting to the point where there’s so many things going on (No, I’m not just blaming you employment!) that my friends are having to actually schedule weekends in advance (See: my weekend in Aurora… scheduled by Cari three weeks ago)
-Personal Issues: This is really a sub category to Time, because these things are what are taking up my time. But, since this is not a diary (thank God), I’m not going to vomit my entire life out all over your internet. Just know that they’re personal, and even if I like you I probably won’t tell you all about them (personality flaw). So just know that you can pray for me (if you’re into that thing), wish your good vibes my way, or just simply be patient with me and i’ll pretty much love you forever (even if I have a funny way of showing it)
Speaking of things I love, this weekend was filled with people i love. here’s just two of them and the weird flowerchild-esque ways we choose to spend our time together, running through botanical gardens and loving life in the great outdoors on a 60-something degree day in Chicago during the end of October.
I’ll post some pictures of the book when I can.